Have you ever thought you were doing something temporarily, say…for a few months, and it turned into YEARS? For the past 4 years, we have repeatedly said, “Well, we can’t do (fill in the blank), because we’re moving soon.” In 2006, we moved back to Texas after being overseas for ministry and weren’t sure what was ahead career-wise. Would we go back to our previous profession and life, or go into a new ministry? So many questions and transition as we’ve been in a rental house since spring of 2007. Well, moving is on the near horizon and we are so excited to move back into our previous house! It’s ready for repairs and we are eager to begin.
It kind of made me laugh because I can’t help but remember something I was asked last year. Am I willing to go to the toilet of people’s lives to walk along with them, whatever they are going through? How ironic that the “toilet in someone’s life” that backed up was mine! People close to me know that transition has been difficult for me. I’ll just say it this way- The scum of my human nature has risen to the top. I vacillate between being content where I am and being utterly frustrated with it. Where I am is completely adequate. Beyond what I need. But yet at times I will feel that it’s not good enough, or I want to be settled already!
Because of my discontentment, I have missed many opportunities. Opportunities for peace, deeper relationships with neighbors, and for organized closets. I never wanted to buy bins or organizational tools because we never felt like we were staying here long. I always felt it was temporary, so we drive into our garage and shut the door. Over the past several months, I have decided that enough was enough, especially in the realm of people on my street. I know at least one of my neighbors is wondering why I suddenly became so much more friendly! God knows that I’ve got “stank” hidden under some carpet in my heart. I need an attitude and heart adjustment. He wants to completely gut the place and do a major overhaul/remodel. I’d settle for getting rid of the smell, but I’ll bet it makes me look a little better, too.